Held hostage

Every Summer there seems to be some territorial bird after me. Last year there was a Mag-pie that was nesting along my path to the local shopping centre. Getting to the shops required covert planning and implementing or I'd get crow pecked to death. Would you imagine carrying a staff to fend of a small bird, weighing less than 3 pounds. The council could do nothing about this, something about a protection act of the damn bird. We had to cross the road and dodge cars just to avoid a run in with the mag-pie.
This year my landlord decided to let the shrub overgrown and now I am scared to death. A smaller bird has taken refuge on one of the over grown trees, poor thing has nestlings in th nest. Yesterday was the last straw I was going to destroy the birds nest (but after seeing the cute chicks I just couldn't). Now there are 3 parent birds all standing guard, against me I think. I have taken an oath to get those damn birds if it's the last thing I do. Now to air my laundry I have to walk the long way, does this make sense? I thought we were at the top of the food chain or do birds now have rights too. I will exercise my right to have dinner and maybe bake the poultry that is unless there is a law against this. In that case I will damp the carcases in the bin and no one will ever know. That is unless you let it out in which case I shouldn't post this.
kman productions.