Pick up lines
Caffeine tablets that don't work, coffee that gives me heartburn and tea that is more like a sedative than a stimulant. These are what I have had to endure as I tried to conquer sleep for a week, how long can a man/woman(bloody feminism) go without sleep and still function properly? I would pay to be in that experiment, yes pay $$ to be the guinea pig for such tests. Last week was one hell of a week, I had so many tasks due that I need about 9 days in the 5 weekdays of that week. In simple terms I needed not to sleep to accomplish this tasks on time and hopefully quality work too. In my deranged state I decided to explore a different aspect of life, pickup lines.
Women have been lucky that majority if the corny lines uttered are towards them and they rarely make asses of themselves. Then again I have a victim of corny lines too, doesn't often but it does. I went full out on this search and may have found some of the supposedly top 10 best and worst of them all. The only problem is that now am tempted to use these tonight as we celebrate it being a Monday. We are college students and we don't need a reason to go out on a weekday, Monday for that matter. 10 best pick up lines I got as listed on http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_top_ten/35b_dating_list.html
10. I was wondering if you have a moment to spare for me to hit on you?
Women are always saying they want guys with a sense of humour and I think this would certainly earn you aminute or two of her time. That is until her annoying over protective friend tag along, they just have ruin it for everybody. Don't you just hate it when you have to pass the girlfriends test, before you can get a dance. We aren't looking for marriage a simple conversation and maybe a dance, we got too much uni work to take it to the next level
09. What's a sexy woman like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
I think this one is kinda corny and most wouldn't fall fall for it, women by the way don't fall for pick up lines. I have learnt that they just let you think your good and you keep making an ass out yourself and then when you meet the next day on campus you can't face them. Learn through experience people, my experience is to keep your lines for your mirror at home. They are too smart and it's we realise this boys and girls.
08. Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
Yet again this is self explanatory but I think she will be smiling even at your candid approach, I am sure a dance wouldn't be too far off. I'd hope not!
07. Who's your friend?
Now this is a good one, I should go try this this evening. Picture the girl you like for the evening and then approach her asking for the friend's name. Firstly she might be quick to tell you but then after it hits her (especially since she is better looking than her friend) she will want to know what was wreong with her. "Once she asks whats wrong with me" then boy you better have prepared a response and don't start drawing maps or spilling drinks all over your hands. I'd suggest if you must have a drink, have a bottle or you're really clumsy have an IV direct to the counter.
06. I'm new in town and can't find my way around; could I have directions to your place?
What can I say this is plain silly, I wonder how it got to be here?
05. I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
Being down to earth is a quality few handsome men posses, they tend to think that because they are good looking they don't have to be nice and all that 'nicety' stuff. Now Unless your good looking, please don't use this line for you could infact be an ugly mother and you oughta be auditioning for horror flicks. The idea is to get her to see your not arrogant.
04. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
Boyish lines may always get a giggle and she might let you buy her a drink, bringing me to my next point. Why the hell do we have to buy drinks and pick up tabs whenever you meet a new lady at a venue. I am not buying another meal for a while and as a matter of fact I will be hoping to get a free drink myself. Once in a while the ladies should turn the tables and surprise us. Worth a try eh? Fellas?
03. What's your name?
This is simple, you would never go wrong with this one that is unless you had your mouth marinated in garlic or cess for the last few days. we should go back to the simplistic days once in a while.
02. See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute.
I think this ine is actually a cute line, you will have her feeling obligated to respond positively and you shouldn't have problems getting a cool 5 minutes of conversation. The 5 minutes you have may determine your fate for the night, depending on your motives. I always suggest keep it simple express interest and I would recommend pickin up at clubs isn't the best way to do it, then again am old school.
01. So what haven't you been told tonight?
Every average+ looking woman in any venue has had a few lines thrown her way and she probably doesn't more crude humour or lame lines for another week or so. This I think would create a comfortable environment and you would be surprised by the level of interest you might arouse from the lady in question.
TEN WORST
10. Hey, I was just thinking of you! Okay, I'm all cleaned up now though."
09. How would you like your eggs for breakfast: scrambled, boiled or fertilized?"
08. What do you say we go back to my place and do some math? Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and multiply!"
07. You might as well sleep with me because I'm going to tell everybody we did it anyway."
06. Hey babe, do you know that my bedroom is soundproof?"
05. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag."
04. I just want to tell you that you have a price to pay for being this cute, and I'm here to collect... your phone number, that is."
03. Did you know women are like parking spots? All the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped. Which are you?
02. Can I buy you a drink or do you prefer the cash instead?"
01. If you've lost your virginity, can I ----------------------------------------------------------?"
Joke 1 was too rude to print on this blog and you can use your imagination, but for those of you who smoked too much weed, just forget joke 1 was there.
Disclaimer...
Kman takes no responsibility for any black eyes, groin kicks or facial scaring that may result from the use of any of the material listed above. However I do take credit and copyright any happy endings that you might receive after using these corny lines. Drop us a line and let us know what other lines you think might be worth putting on this list, let's build a library for men to make fools of themselves (I included).
Kman Productions.........................
Women have been lucky that majority if the corny lines uttered are towards them and they rarely make asses of themselves. Then again I have a victim of corny lines too, doesn't often but it does. I went full out on this search and may have found some of the supposedly top 10 best and worst of them all. The only problem is that now am tempted to use these tonight as we celebrate it being a Monday. We are college students and we don't need a reason to go out on a weekday, Monday for that matter. 10 best pick up lines I got as listed on http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_top_ten/35b_dating_list.html
10. I was wondering if you have a moment to spare for me to hit on you?
Women are always saying they want guys with a sense of humour and I think this would certainly earn you aminute or two of her time. That is until her annoying over protective friend tag along, they just have ruin it for everybody. Don't you just hate it when you have to pass the girlfriends test, before you can get a dance. We aren't looking for marriage a simple conversation and maybe a dance, we got too much uni work to take it to the next level
09. What's a sexy woman like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
I think this one is kinda corny and most wouldn't fall fall for it, women by the way don't fall for pick up lines. I have learnt that they just let you think your good and you keep making an ass out yourself and then when you meet the next day on campus you can't face them. Learn through experience people, my experience is to keep your lines for your mirror at home. They are too smart and it's we realise this boys and girls.
08. Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
Yet again this is self explanatory but I think she will be smiling even at your candid approach, I am sure a dance wouldn't be too far off. I'd hope not!
07. Who's your friend?
Now this is a good one, I should go try this this evening. Picture the girl you like for the evening and then approach her asking for the friend's name. Firstly she might be quick to tell you but then after it hits her (especially since she is better looking than her friend) she will want to know what was wreong with her. "Once she asks whats wrong with me" then boy you better have prepared a response and don't start drawing maps or spilling drinks all over your hands. I'd suggest if you must have a drink, have a bottle or you're really clumsy have an IV direct to the counter.
06. I'm new in town and can't find my way around; could I have directions to your place?
What can I say this is plain silly, I wonder how it got to be here?
05. I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
Being down to earth is a quality few handsome men posses, they tend to think that because they are good looking they don't have to be nice and all that 'nicety' stuff. Now Unless your good looking, please don't use this line for you could infact be an ugly mother and you oughta be auditioning for horror flicks. The idea is to get her to see your not arrogant.
04. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
Boyish lines may always get a giggle and she might let you buy her a drink, bringing me to my next point. Why the hell do we have to buy drinks and pick up tabs whenever you meet a new lady at a venue. I am not buying another meal for a while and as a matter of fact I will be hoping to get a free drink myself. Once in a while the ladies should turn the tables and surprise us. Worth a try eh? Fellas?
03. What's your name?
This is simple, you would never go wrong with this one that is unless you had your mouth marinated in garlic or cess for the last few days. we should go back to the simplistic days once in a while.
02. See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute.
I think this ine is actually a cute line, you will have her feeling obligated to respond positively and you shouldn't have problems getting a cool 5 minutes of conversation. The 5 minutes you have may determine your fate for the night, depending on your motives. I always suggest keep it simple express interest and I would recommend pickin up at clubs isn't the best way to do it, then again am old school.
01. So what haven't you been told tonight?
Every average+ looking woman in any venue has had a few lines thrown her way and she probably doesn't more crude humour or lame lines for another week or so. This I think would create a comfortable environment and you would be surprised by the level of interest you might arouse from the lady in question.
TEN WORST
10. Hey, I was just thinking of you! Okay, I'm all cleaned up now though."
09. How would you like your eggs for breakfast: scrambled, boiled or fertilized?"
08. What do you say we go back to my place and do some math? Add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and multiply!"
07. You might as well sleep with me because I'm going to tell everybody we did it anyway."
06. Hey babe, do you know that my bedroom is soundproof?"
05. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag."
04. I just want to tell you that you have a price to pay for being this cute, and I'm here to collect... your phone number, that is."
03. Did you know women are like parking spots? All the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped. Which are you?
02. Can I buy you a drink or do you prefer the cash instead?"
01. If you've lost your virginity, can I ----------------------------------------------------------?"
Joke 1 was too rude to print on this blog and you can use your imagination, but for those of you who smoked too much weed, just forget joke 1 was there.
Disclaimer...
Kman takes no responsibility for any black eyes, groin kicks or facial scaring that may result from the use of any of the material listed above. However I do take credit and copyright any happy endings that you might receive after using these corny lines. Drop us a line and let us know what other lines you think might be worth putting on this list, let's build a library for men to make fools of themselves (I included).
Kman Productions.........................
posted by kman Productions at
6:00 pm
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