Monday, September 05, 2005

Never ending Story

Ten years ago talking to a girl without popping a blood vessel was unimaginable, remember the sweaty palms and tremble? Yeah well maybe for you it was when you were 10, actually then I was more concerned with girl germs than anything else. The all to familiar wiping a seat to avoid getting infected, coming to think it I more like 8 years old. Eew! He was talking to a girl, YUCK! Fast forward, some 14 years later and you couldn't wait to ................................

Anyway I thought I'd out-grow some of these silly traits, getting nervous, sweaty palms (give me a sec as I wring my keyboard), lose of words,eagerness etc. Is it still normal to get nervous? I'd have thought that was boyish behaviour in our adolescence years, remember the breaking voice? My favouite was beginning a conversation in low bass and halfway through you've stepped through tones never discoverd before;never thought my vocals could go that high. Before you know it, they are hot women walking around you (previously germ ridden, now they are HOT!). I vividly remember that phase, the beginning of designer clothes collections (didn't care when mum got the money, I wanted them). Nothing has changed, I still want designer clothes and maybe the biggest step has been I pay for them. Remember telling mum, "I hate you?", just because she couldn't afford to feed you and satisfy Tommy Hilfiger cravings, that was when I converted to NIKE (just do it convert) much cheaper I thought.

Here I am, just like a ten year old nervous that I am about to call a girl. The usual signs are their, I have the paramedics on stand-by, my brown bag just incase I hyperventilate. Whos idea was it to have a brown bag that you breathe in when you get nervous? Logically you will be inhaling more C02 than normal, result? MORE HYPERVENTILATION! Back to my little ordeal here, the clock is ticking and I will dial eventually. Mouthful of scotch may help but then it may slur speech too, maybe a mouthful of water, parched throat is another sign of nervousness and could spell disaster.Even got the shakes now, that could be from heavy drinking too (only problem I never drink that much or that often either).

Glad to see these things may never change and as years pass by even though I am more confident, the rush is still there. 'Kinda' ok because it ups the stakes slightly, if I blow this it's back to more studying and trying to build a linux server (personally am kinda tired of the latter). I'd say the stakes are way up there, wouldn't you?

Kman Productions.........................
PS
I know this narrative is incoherent, if you haven't realised it by now am quite edgy and jumpy today.Dreading that phone call in 30 min,I need to change my jumper soon; sweaty as can be.Thank goodness for cotton and deodrant, don't know what I'd do..........

1 Comments:

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4:18 pm, September 05, 2005  

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