Sunday, February 27, 2005

MEN!!!!!! Don't shake my hand,ever!

How bad is it when you meet people, men for that matter and you don't want to shake hands. It's customary for people to shake hands an introduction, screw that custom am not shaking any mans hand again (not unless I have a glove). Many a times that I have frequented the public lavatories only to be astonished by the lack of personal hygiene in the toilet department. A man will walk in to the cubicle, do his business and just walk out. The stench from the cubicle is adequate proof that he wasn't touching up on his makeup, that is unless ammonia and sulphur scents have made it to Revlon.
Will I be considered rude the next time someone extends his/her hand and I retract with genuine disgust? Is there a way to make introductions without worrying about the history of the hand extended to me? The only safe way is be appear to be a snob arrogant for some but live a long clean life. On the other hand man could simply wash their hands more often and maybe, just maybe I will resume shaking hands. Why do I doubt that my fellow men would prefer to result to their barbaric stance of unwashed hands after the loo . Why do you think they put sinks in toilets, two at least in most public toilets? Was is for aesthetic value or was there a real function for these tiled device?
I propose you don't shake our hands, I know this sounds strange but I too am a bloke. I wash my hands each time I step out of the bathroom, even if I was brushing my teeth. Paranoid?Maybe, but I know that I have a clean hand, not sanitised but clean to an accepted degree. For goodness sake men just let the water run even if you don't run the water on your hands. Just to fool the people outside that you're conscious about cleanliness. Was is next to godliness? I don't think so, not in this generation of men anyway.
kman productions.........

Sickie

What would we do without the annual 8 days we are prone to get sick? Most employees will get an average of a week paid sick in a year, which most don't use. I am not a believer in taking a sick day just because I went out the night before. A social life like mine is what the employers want, can do attitude and no questions asked. I bet I would do well in the military, "sir yes sir". My employer is a multi-billion dollar company, I however probably hold the lowest rank in the company;service assistant. I am the unlucky person that has to deal with customers on a day p day basis and bare the grunt of the stuff-ups from the $1.6 million dollar salary CEO and his bunch of lazy fat (89% are fat) managers.
The problem with being the slave in the organization is that after a while I lost the drive to work whole heartedly. Irony is that 4 years ago I was so dedicated that I never dreamed of seeking a transfer. I am a true believer in doing the very best in whatever job you're in,cleaner or manager (give it your best). My company has used me and a few other hard working people to ensure the company runs. Our back and muscle are what keep the company running, what do e get more work. Why is it that more initiative an employee shows,the more work they get? Promotions are given to those who don't do much, the logic is that they will lose the hard workers if they promote them. Most of my bosses don't/can't do half the work I do, they just couldn't do it, they sit in their offices and chat/gossip.
On that note I have sworn to use up all my sick days on days when I know I am the key player and my absence will be noted. Last night I went out for a few hrs and got home before midnight, enough time to sleep and rest. I however decided to teach them a lesson, am not a slave for this bastards. So before sleeping I called my store and put through my sick day fo today. I will get paid but the departrment will be in chaos for a week, what do I care. They treat us like rubbish they pay for it, we could always find slave jobs elsewhere but the managers are to blame if the stores don't perform. Suck on that employer
kman productions......

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Hard day

My csci3111 class was probably the beginning of a long session, got there at 1335 only to find the auditorium teaming with people. There weren't seats and the many years of being a naughty student would take effect today. Many years ago I underwent a gruesome encounter with the cane while in school and today I wished I'd been a saint then. Some of us had to take positions on the floor just to listen to a long and if I must say boring lecture. The content of the lecture didn't bother me as much as sitting on the ground. My butt was so sore that I kept fidgeting as if I had ants in my pants. I guess I'd rather have had the ants than relive the same process next week. Dear Mr Chancellor, we are suffering and it wouldn't hurt if we got a bigger room or maybe better carpet;rugs would be better. Team projects was emphasized and this got my heart racing. Most students in my faculty hate the notion of having to sit through a 5 minute presentation twice a session. That is 10 min in 3 months an get student to change a course to a more essay oriented subject, why do we hate oral presentations so much. I for one tend to freeze at the onset right before it's my turn to take the podium. Once I get there, it's like everything seizes to exist and all I see are my ideas (or some poor blokes ideas that I may have stolen,tough luck!). The time flies and your left with so much more to but there isn't enough time. Back to my butt, I just hope we get a bigger room for next week or I now know which lectures I will be missing this lecture. Might be the most popular lecture with people lining up hours before to secure a seat. Imagine how this would go with the lecturers ego, he might feel like a rock star;just for that moment. I guess he does deserve some pride but, what about those of us who are ever late and believe that the timetable is only a suggestion to lecture times? Off for a back massage,compensation might be on it's way. I didn't get my assignment in on time because I threw my back, there's a valid excuse class of CSCI311. kman production.....

Friday, February 18, 2005

Dieting my ass

How many times have you been told that what you eat insn't good for you? I am tired of people thinking that just because some celebrity has endossed some diet we should all get on it. Children have now been forced to take up skim milk, can't they bun the 'fat' like the rest of us. We are now well equiped with calorie calculators every time we go shopping. Lets get facts straight, true there is a majority of western citizens who are obese/fat. This has led to a new industry that I will call 'diet facade empire', every meal has a low in something on the label. For most of the meals, 'reduced fat' is added to the label. I have seen supermarkets change from normal stock to stocking everything from reduced fat to fat free and even now 1% fat. whatever fat content you are after, you will not be dissapointed.
My biggest worry is that most people are ignorant and taking this diets to the extreme. My own family has on individual who doesn't take fat, period. I am worried to see salad being consumed daily, lemon water for breakfast topped with watermelon. For lunch two tea spoon of food and then in the afternoon a shake of some sort. No food s eaten past certain times and supplements have taken over what used to be the pantry cupboards. I pose the question, is this normal behaviour or should brace ourselves for an anorexic in the family (not my nuclear family, we all hog like pigs,civil pigs that is). Going out with friends is a no no, for there might be fatty foods served. What will one night of finger food do to you? The environment might even be good for you, there may be music and you find yourself dancing. burning those dreaded calories.
One comment that broke the camel's back was being told that too much tea could make you fat. Huh? Pardon me. How much tea would I be drinking to have enough milk to make me fat? Unless I live on a farm and suckle directly off the cow with a tea bag in my mouth, there is no way to get fat. Skim milk in tea,what are we doing? Why not make the tea without water and just pour the skim milk in the kettle and boil ,then put a tea bag.
The dieting situation is so dire that one would be mistaken to think that we are inactive. Everybody is trying to be skinny and what's worse we are just getting fat. Now I am against people telling us what to eat and claiming they have the perfect diet. Aren't supplements meant for invalids, or people not getting enough in their diets. One tablet could contain the equivalent of an apple,orange maybe even an egg (eew! nasty combination). Wouldn't it be better to eat the fruits other than a pill that may have more than you need. I doubt over eating fruits will have side-effects other than maybe a sore tummy. Supplements are still being tested for long term effects and I for one will continue to eat fresh fruit. How many people use supplements daily, even doctors don't recommend this.
Let's get over the dieting fabs, cutting out on carbs is a crazy notion. How is your body meant to acquire energy, internal combustion? The minute you cut out on carbs your body will adjust adequately and once you re-introduce the carbs after the dieting season, shazaam fat. You need carbs for God's sake, don't cut out on carbs and eat proteins only. Walk to work if you can, take a walk to the shops or even a walk around the block. Hire or buy are push bike and take a ride on the weekend, cut down on the booze and maybe reduce on junk food. God help me, I hope never to take on any these diets.
My relative on the other hand has decided not to eat, trying to get a six pack at the age of 30+. Sure sitting infront if the TV after work for 6 hours daily will do wonders for the tummy, forget the 6 pack missy. Get out of the house, take a walk or something crunches can only do as much.
kman productions.......

Held hostage

Every Summer there seems to be some territorial bird after me. Last year there was a Mag-pie that was nesting along my path to the local shopping centre. Getting to the shops required covert planning and implementing or I'd get crow pecked to death. Would you imagine carrying a staff to fend of a small bird, weighing less than 3 pounds. The council could do nothing about this, something about a protection act of the damn bird. We had to cross the road and dodge cars just to avoid a run in with the mag-pie.
This year my landlord decided to let the shrub overgrown and now I am scared to death. A smaller bird has taken refuge on one of the over grown trees, poor thing has nestlings in th nest. Yesterday was the last straw I was going to destroy the birds nest (but after seeing the cute chicks I just couldn't). Now there are 3 parent birds all standing guard, against me I think. I have taken an oath to get those damn birds if it's the last thing I do. Now to air my laundry I have to walk the long way, does this make sense? I thought we were at the top of the food chain or do birds now have rights too. I will exercise my right to have dinner and maybe bake the poultry that is unless there is a law against this. In that case I will damp the carcases in the bin and no one will ever know. That is unless you let it out in which case I shouldn't post this.
kman productions.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Bizzare Law

Last week I came across an article in the paper that shocked me, nothing does anymore (maybe the site of a cockroach which is besides the point). An council in America was considering fining people for exposing their underwear in public. Basically no individuals will be allowed to sag in public, unless their undies don't show. I for one need to express my surpise at the lenghts some individuals have gone to have this tabled in the councils chambers. Do you wake up and think, "am tired of seeing boxers in public"?
Lets get something straight, I don't enjoy the sight of G-strings every time a woman drops a coin or is trying to fix her shoes. I also don't torelate some bloke with his pants so low that they are more on the floor than on but who am I to pass a law banning this? I wonder whether there will be a ban on swim wear, or is this just targeted at men (boys to be precise). Pass this law and you need to pass laws against bikinis at the beach too. I could make a complain that the sight of women in no more than strings is disturbing to me and request my local councillor to table a motion at his next meeting. What are councils doing, aren't they employed to run the city? Now they are the fashion police, soon wearing too much bling will be deemed dangerous to drivers; too much reflection of the sun.
I couldn't get the url for these article but rest assured I a working on it. I will find the damn link and you can all see for yourselves what the next generation councils are up to. My guess some old person or up tight individual got tired of his/her kids asking for oversized clothes and ran for office,won and now is taking us by the zip. Soon these will go into the nation parliament/congress of whatever body makes laws in your country. Imagine all if us in Harvad style dressing,wouldn't that bad afterall. Save me a lot of money in the fashion aspects, on seconds thoughts pass the damn law worldwide.

kman productions

Men and Women

Now am not an expert of the feminine species but I do know a few things. The few times I've braved to leave my computer desk and go clubbing I have seen a lot. I have nothing but pity for most of the women and girls out there. Why do women have to wear high heels on the dance floor? Now back to basics, my physics teacher told me that F=m*A. meaning that the thinner the heel the more pressure is exerted.
Back to my question, why wear heels on a night out. My biggest problem is when the complaining starts, "Oh these shoes are killing me". Dah! I am wearing low rubber heeled shoes,maybe even canvas shoes and am I aint complaining. Planning is the key here, personally you don't have to wear heels to impress. Heels will probably wade the inteligent guys away,they know that they may have to be listening to a shoe discomfort narration for the better part of the evening. On the other side, most bouncers will only let is scantly dressed women in the club. What is this a brothel convention,not that every high heel totting lady is sexual worker (just making a point here)? You watch those queues and the high heels will never wait long like we, the canvas clad geeks. Ladies heels aren't that good for you, but then again you don't need me to tell you this. Common knowledge,doctors even have this in research that later in life there are effects. Smoking too kills you know, but people still smoke never will get that reasoning .
My challenge would be to see a girl out in comfortable shoes and jeans nothing tacky but desent and tell me if they will not enjoy the night. You may not get as many drunks all over you and many free drinks but the next day will be good. No sore legs to complain about.

high heel= possibly sore legs

canvas, low heels = longer dancing period and fit a fiddle next day unless you get drunk and crush your car or get into a fist fight you dummy.

Think about it
kman productions

Where are you from

Is there anyone out there that hates being asked this,"where are you from?". What the hell is the basis of that, conversation starter? Jeez you ask me that and you will not only get a rude answer but you'll never ask another stranger again. We have differen't skin tones and accents and people especially caucasian have the habit of asking this. I never ask anyone where they are from, what does that have to do with anything? Hie I am Irish,so that mean am a drunk or am African and we don't have houses we all live in hut and run. Even better I am Australian (am not) and I rare Kangaroos!!! People don't ask me where am from as a converstation starter, or mention that I have an accent. "Or my God I didn't know, you mean I do have an accent". If you ask me you're the one with the accent,not I.
If you're gonna ask where am from,slide it in at the end of the conversation after a chat not before so you can stereotype me. And yes I live in a hut, so what I aint fat like you are.

Mc Donald's made me fat

Only when Mc Donalds makes it to your neighbourhood do you realise that you have made it. let's face it,they provide convience to many parents cooking meals on weekends. I am not a parent and don't consume a lot of their food,nonetheless I have and will continue to advocate Mc's. I don't have a weight problem and by the looks of things may never have one, maybe cholestrol my be a bit high. Where do we get off when we sue Ronny for making us fat? Was society ambushed and force fed the Big Mac for the last 3yrs or was there a famine and the only available food was junk food.
Let's get one thing straight,Mc Donalds doesn't make anyone fat, overeating is the culprit. The Western culture is full of fat people(call them overweight,who cares fat is fat). To my understanding there are those among us who have gland problems and can't help but gain weight. It has been suggested that it's not their fault, I am not a Dr and can't refute these claims yet. Majority of the obese people aren't ill or suffering from the so called low metabolic rate condition. Does it take a PhD student to know that eating too much junk can leave you succesptible to gtting fat or less harshe overweight. Hell! To much of any food will make you fat or sick. There is a joke that some people are too short for their weight,ha ha ha (the health system aint laughing). Total bull if you ask me.
Back to Mc, what idiot will sue Ronny for making them fat,don't you realise that they fry their food? Don't tell me they have a new way of making fries by using water instead frying in grease/oil. God! French fries, fries means contact with fat. In our case french fries, is like having chips with your oil. Have an occassional treat over the weekend or during those hectic days, junk food on some days will not kill. God I hope not.
Sue Mc, if I were a lawyer I'd offer free services to the Franchise and in return get the weekend all you can eat at any restaurant with the golden arcs. People, grow up and get over it, over-indulgance in junk food will make you fat. A large big mac,large fries and diet coke will not cut it. What the hell is the diet coke for? If you're oveweight, cut down on the junk intake and have a fruit salad for dessert once in a while. Take a walk to the corner store that is 1km away, it doesn't kill you. You might even be chased by a territorial bird when you walk by its tree and get a cardio workout. God knows we could use some cardio......
Some people want them (fast food) banned,what the hell is capitalism? I believe it's the idea that any individual can make it,Mc saw an opportunity and took it. Let's be China and ban every freedom we enjoy,back to basics and enrol every citizen in the navy for atleast 3yrs, that'd get us all in shape I bet.
Grow up people
Kman productions

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Inertia

Why were we ever in school for so long learning about science? "We will never apply this", we thought and sadly said. How many times have we thought of the use of most of what we study or learn? Science on ne hand may have been hard for some while others like myself liked it even though I wasn't the best in it. Back to the principles of Inertia,when riding a bicycle downhill don't brake the front wheel. It appear trivial but I have witnessed so many silly accidents by people who I believe made it through grade 5 even better high school.
Who doesn't know that when going downhill you will topple over if you brake without thinking? On Saturday I was amazed by a freak incident,a lady was riding down hill in her new bicyle. Everything seemed normal until she fell for no apparent reason whatsoever,then again inertia was playing foul here. For goodness sake people Einstein didn't spend all those slepless nights for nothing,respect the dead guy by observing certain principle. Inertia being one of them.
kman

Valentines

Well how about spending your valentines day staring at a computer monitor,that's my perfect gift. I don't go for the chocolate or roses could be because I have not had a girlfriend during the month of Feb. Sad? I don't think so, but what does that say about the life span of any relationships that may have sprouted. They don't get to run for a year,if they do they are ochestrated to be after Feb 14 and end before that day; say Feb 13 is a good date.
Then again being busy doesn't help either,does it? Let's hope this year is different,get the grades up and hopefully last for most than a few months on the dating scene.
kman

Blog this

After many weeks or trying to learn dreamweaver, I need a break. I wonder what my peers will say after they realise I took the shortcut? Nevertheless i will get back to dreamweaver after assessing my uni schedule and commitement. Welcome to kman-productions